Lesbian travel in Fiji

Any lesbian couples out there who have traveled to Fiji? Have read some interesting info re: the Fijian attitude toward same sex couples and the importance of not displaying any PDA while in FIJI. Not that we are an exhibitionist kinda couple, but hard to imagine being on vacation with my honey and not being able to hold her hand in public, etc. Just wondering how serious this issue is over there? We are headed there for 9 days in October and would love to hear any feedback from those who have already been there. Thanks much!

Well, only because I really-really doubt you'll get replies from other lesbians (this is a small branch), let me add my 2 cents:

As far as I understand, lesbians are simply unheard of and unthought of in much of the South Pacific.
So it would take something much less innocent than holding hands for locals to even start wondering if they are seeing something "wrong" - and that's before they could even possibly get upset.

Even gay men are almost unseen/unheard of in most of Melanesia, though in the cities of Fiji (which is culturally closer to Polynesia) they are visible and seem well-tolerated.

The actual attitudes on the ground seem a LOT more relaxed than the Victorian laws in this heavily Christian region would suggest!

OK, now let me wish you more informed replies by "insiders"! ;-)

Well, as with Laszlo, I'm not a gay person, but I've lived in the SP for many years, mainly in the Cooks. Actually, ANY overt type of romantic exhibition ---by gay or straights--- is usually frowned upon by locals, who are publically fairly conservative and reserved in showing public affection. Fijians are fairly used to seeing gay men, or at least knowing them in towns and cities, but not so much in small villages. Not many overt lesbians in the SP, at least much less so than gay men.

I guess if you compromised with occasional handholding but not kissing, you would have a very low risk of offending anyone, or even being noticed that much. This is for in town, city, etc. On the resort area beaches I don't think kissing a bit would matter much, they tolerate tourists' actions more in tourist areas.

I guess I would suggest you handhold if you really feel in the mood, but don't if it will be an all-over-each-other type of thing. This is true even for straights.

But Fijians are in general pretty tolerant of tourists, unless you are in a small village and it is Sunday, a more sacred day, etc.

So, can't speak from personal experience, just a sense of what it might be like there.

I had many gay and lesbian couples stay at my resort in the Cooks (Shangri-La), and basically gave them the same advice as above. Fiji can be a little more conservative than the Cooks in comparable rural areas, but probably about the same in tourist areas as the Cooks.

So, enjoy your trip and each other, but just think of it like being constantly walking around in or near a big church for the most part, with some, but not total discretion, needed.

And even if someone was offended, they would rarely say anything to you or take any action to make your trip unpleasant, etc., they are probably too courteous---for the most part---to risk offending you..

I have some lesbian (and gay) friends here in the Fijian community; many work in the tourism and hospitality sector. Although having homosexual relationship is prohibited by law, some of them show it in the way they dress, walk or talk. There are certain pubs (in Nadi or Suva) which are known as gay hangouts. However they hardly ever show affections towards their partners in public (but this is hardly ever done between a hetero couple) , because that could get them in trouble. "Holding hands” won't fall in this category; actually I have seen "straight" men walking along the street, holding hands.
Despite this law, which prohibits the homosexual relationships, gays are generally accepted, but there will always be some silly people making fun of them. Just ignore those.

Showing affection towards partners is a behavior so strange and uncommon at all on the islands that the issue of the couple being lesbian is the least important here. Holding hands is alright, everything else is not. Just like that. Or kiss the cheek.

If in doubt just look what the locals are doing. You will see more signs of affection being exchanged between two sisters or between two brothers than between couples.

It is likely that 2 women or 2 men holding hands is more acceptable than a male/female pair, as this is what friends of the same sex do in Melanesian countries. However, anything more overt would be frowned upon if it was in public.

"...some of them show it in the way they dress..."

Interesting-I spotted one Tongan lesbian by the bracelet she wore-a heavy leather studded affair common among that type here in Canada.

I suppose I must have sneered a little-I'm not without my prejudices-and the look she gave me was unlike anything I've ever seen.

A combination of something close to murder (if I opened my mouth ) /fear of being hunted/constant persecution and some other very raw emotions.

I mumbled something and left the store.

Later back @ my hotel I started to feel bad, almost went back and apologised for upsetting her.

Next we met she was all smiles she had seen me in Church-was right behind me in fact here sister & niece were right beside me and that was that (the bracelet was gone) .

Of course that gave me further insight into her situation in that small community-Church going/hat wearing lady, Auntie (itself an important role in Tongan society) and store Manager, some parts of her life must be very difficult.

"As far as I understand, lesbians are simply unheard of and unthought of in much of the South Pacific."|

Not quite and with society modernising quickly some awkward changes are forthcoming.

Edited by: hardnosethehighway

Whilst I do agree with the above, it is important to note that homosexual relationships are against the law in Fiji and there have been cases in very recent years of gays being prosecuted and jailed (though not to my memory lesbians).

Not lesbians but especially not tourists.

I think the Pacific islands are a bit like Queen Victoria - they only recognise, (and often ban) relationships between gay men.

Wasn't there a well-publicized murder of a local gay couple a year or two back? I read there was a gay resort "Man Friday" but that appears to have disappeared. What is a pair of travelling gay couples to do?

#9
Quite Victorian. In many more ways too.

#10
What is a pair of gay couples to do when traveling on the islands? Just what all couples have to do there, locals and tourists alike: keep distance and if not, don't make noise and let nobody see anything. Nothing special and yes, really victorian.

Gays and lesbians are slowly becoming acceptable here in Fiji. The general straight population in Fiji at one stage would show disapproval of attire for a gay/lesinan (extreme situations) person but this has somehow faded.
PDA's? this would depend.....a kiss on the cheek is acceptable, a long lingering french kiss would probably offend the locals. Most straight females hold hands in Fiji....as a sign of friendship..if you intend to hold hands it would probably be camouflaged and may not draw attention.
If you are going to the hotel/tourist areas you will have no problem with PDA however when traveling to the town and city areas you may just have to tone it down abit.....you might find a few stares coming your way...but that will probably be the worst that you will get...otherwise it will be all smiles.
Enjoy your trip to my beautiful Fiji.

Does anyone know anything about the actual queer Fijan culture? Its one thing to say its looked down upon in general, but what do the actual queer Fijans do for fun? For purpose? Where do they hang out? Has anyone sought after this info?