10 night honeymoon in Tonga - trip report

A quick, blissful report for those considering a trip to Tonga.

Accommodation:
1 night at Nerima Lodge, Nuku'alofa - best avoided, plenty of other cleaner, better alternatives possibly even away from the incessant dogs and roosters.
7 nights at Matafonua Lodge, Ha'apai - brilliant, HIGHLY recommended honeymoon destination. Simple, comfortable, clean fales, friendly staff, great food, beautiful beaches, snorkelling and kayaking.
2 nights at Ali Baba's, Nuku'alofa - clean, comfortable, would gladly return. Free brekky pretty good!

Eating:
Nerima Lodge, Nuku'alofa - avoid the free bacon and egg breakfast!
Friends Cafe, Nuku'alofa - wonderful banana smoothie, great atmosphere.
Billfish, Nuku'alofa - interesting "fusion" of Tongan and western culture. Good beer and cocktail menu.
Lunarossa, Nuku'alofa - divine seafood, impressive service and venue, magic location, supplemented by a dodgy Australian wine list! Pretty special place on the lagoon, just make sure you check the address - it's no longer in the town centre.
Bakery around the corner from Friends Cafe - westernised comfort food... but worth a return visit
Chateau Ice Cream, Nuku'alofa - YUM!
Mariners, Ha'apai - pretty average, definitely missable
Mataku-ae-tau Bakery near Lindsay Guesthouse, Ha'apai - don't be tempted by the lure of Tongan donuts!
Sandy Beach Resort, Ha'apai - good seafood but over priced, and a little too regimented whereby everyone must eat together.
Matafonua Lodge, Ha'apai - fantastic ladies in the kitchen, menu changes daily, maybe a bit pricey and too westernised, but still great.
Don't leave Tonga without trying Ota Ika (fish, lime, coconut milk)

Regrets:
Not getting to Vav'au, 'Eua or Uoleva
Not drinking Kava, despite the stories

Best memories:
Friendly locals
Laidback atmosphere of Ha'apai
The unroadworthy jalopies the call taxis in Ha'apai
A radio station dedicated to reggae versions of Christmas carols

Worst memories:
The work experience kid pretending to be a pilot on Airlines Tonga, Ha'apai-Nuku'alofa. Yikes.

Hope that helps!

Did you see any transvestite fights at the Billfish? I found it one of Tonga's more entertaining places.

this is the first criticism of Nerima lodge that I've heard. They normally come highly rated.

what happened?

I agree with most of above written, except criticts of Nerima lodge. Dogs and roosters are spread all around and can be as annoying as one can imagine. They don't roar more around Nerima as elsewhere. It was clean, friendly with helpful stuff and both, my husband and I, have best experiences from Nuku 'Alofa due to friendly hostess of Nerima. During the day we were so busy jumping around that we felt asleep exhausted. We didn't even hear the roosters, pigs nor dogs. It can be a bit different for newlyweds, I agree. But I still highly recommend Nerima lodge. With great pleasure.

I've just spent four nights in Tongatapu:
The first two nights at Ali Baba's. After settling in on arrival, we asked our host - I think her name is Rita - to simply point us in the right direction toward town. She tried to discourage us from doing so, citing that "most of town is burnt down" Now it's my first time in Tonga, and maybe it used to be little NYC or something, but it certainly didnt look like a burnt-down town centre. In hindsight, after later events, I suppose it was just her effort to get us to say in and spend our money on meals at her place. Bu shouldn't a propieter do that with great service and a welcoming approach, instead of a lie?
Our room was tidy - but overpriced. The shared bathoom was frightening: always soaking wet, nothing ever dries in there including te floor and walls, a playground for germs; there were never less than 5 or 6 mosquitos in there - the one place you dont want to have to cover up or swat. There was never once hot - or even warm water in the shower.
The breakfast was fine each morning.

There was a couple in the room next to us that were up talking and drinking all nite. The woman even mistakenly barged into our room at 3.15am, thinking it was hers. Then she and her partner proceeded to turn on the telly at full blast. About fifteen minutes later, my partner knocked on their door and said "enough".
On the next morning, we went looking for somewhere else to stay. Most places we saw were AWFUL. We saw Nerima and liked it.
By the end of that day, we'd decided to leave Nuku'alofa altogether. We got back to Ali Baba later and asked to use the fone so that we could check out availabiliy of other places and "Rita" told us everything was sold out. She suggested we stay at Good Samaritan and charged us 30 pa'anga to take us there (it was sunday and there were no busses running). She said friends of hers run the place and pretended, when we got there, that she loved going there for lunch. She dropped us and left. Good Samaritan was the worst dump I've ever seen in my life and I dont even believe they have a license to operate as accommodation. THIS WAS THE CRAZY ALI BABA LADY'S RECCOMMENDATION. Surely there was a kickback involved!

We got ourselves back to Nuku'alofa and went straight to Nerima: spotless, better than spotless; ultra clean and comfortable beds and bedding; very helpful and gracious hostess; a lovely respectful clientelle, so no loud conversations in the common areas all night;cool, breezy veranda; super tidy bathrooms, showers and kitchen. I can't say enough positive about Nerima. And breakfast was excellent, including a yummy ripe avocado from the tree in the yard.

For a honeymoon, I would have gone to a fabulous resort, not an inner-city guest house. If anyone has had a less than perfect experience at Nerima, surely it's an abberation.

Myself and my girlfriend have just spent a few days at Nerima and have found it wonderful. Super friendly (the owner even helped us research other resorts to move onto later in our trip - I've never know that before) and very clean - so I'm not sure what the problem was there - and the breaky (as well as anyhting else you want cooked) is great, actually. We will definately be returning. Highly recomended.

The OP was just having a "bad hair" day.